an excerpt from my new book
On the one end of the scale, we have emotions that feel like lovely, wonderful warm fuzzy bubbles of energy; like when you fall in love, or when you first set eyes on your new-born baby’s face. We have feelings of satisfaction when we graduate or launch a new business. We experience joy when getting married or lose the last 5 pounds of stubborn belly fat. We feel bliss when delving into a delicious tub of chocolate ice cream or when lying on the grass watching the clouds go by. These are the emotions that make us feel alive, good, amazing, like life is worth living.
On the opposite end of the scale, we have those emotions, you know, those ones. The ones that have the capacity to send you off into the deepest darkest places of despair. That put you in a state of anxiety, make you feel sick to your stomach, or send you off to your room to sit in a corner or hide under the duvet where you want to stay forever and never come out again. Sometimes these emotions even drive you into bouts of rage where you feel like you’re having an out of body experience. There’s nothing pleasant about those emotions and we’d rather not have them, pretend they don’t exist and try our best to supress them. They make us feel abnormal, depressed, frustrated, ashamed and irritated that we even have them at all! For some people, there are times that their emotions make them feel so bad that it feels like life isn’t worth living.
Emotions have the ability to either enhance our lives or to totally devastate them. That is, until you change your perception about them. There are no bad feelings, all of them are necessary for life. The lovely feelings that make you feel good, exist for that reason only, to make you feel good so that you can enjoy your life and not go through it in a zombie like state. Your uncomfortable feelings tell you when something is wrong, that you are off track, that what is going on in your life is not good for you, that it’s not in line with who you are nor what you want. The uncomfortable feelings are the ones that you need to pay the most attention to. The worst thing you can do is to ignore them, to suppress them, to over-analyse them or to beat yourself up about them. Instead, see them as wake up calls, as little mini voices that are trying to get your attention, to pay attention.
The way I like to view my emotions is as my very own built-in GPS system. When I feel bad, especially on a consistent basis, then I know that I’m off course of being authentically me or I’m off course of living my life according to my heart’s desire.
Categories: Emotion Communication from The Heart Book